missing my little monkeys

I still miss my little monkeys. Their smiles, silly faces, jokes, tears, and tricks are still the number one box office hit replaying over an over again in my mind. Not only do the children of the Hogar occupy my thoughts but also my many bliss filled days laying on those romantic, or in some cases dirty Carribean beaches, my treks through the endless jungles... chasing waterfalls and zip lines over hot springs. Of course it wouldn't be a box office hit if it weren't for the adventures through central america via "chicken buses" and bumpy boat rides and those endless nights of wild Latino parties in the streets of Ceiba...nights I'll probably never remember, with friends I'll never forget.

Although I am so glad to have such pleasant and warm filled memories constantly filtering through my brain and I am so thankful to have had such an life changing experience I still cannot get over the harsh realties that these children still face as I continue on with my blessed life that I have been born into. In some ways I have come to accept that there are things that I cannot change and with the support of others I have realized that I have done all I can do help certain situations and the rest must be left up to others and to be put in the hands of God. However it does take some reminding to remember I have convinced my self of these things. Well, perhaps I haven't quite sold these notions to myself...perhaps I still do have trouble accepting that there is nothing more that I can do sometimes.

After working with the children at the Hogar, and the children here at the Tim Horton Camp it has became even more apparent that I am meant to work in a field with children at social risk. Children living in inhuman conditions, poverty stricked, abused, neglected. I am not a person who can stand by and let these injustices continue. I am not meant to leave it up to others. I will be a part of something great that will change myself and the lives of other in a positive way that I can't even begin to imagine. Something has been stirring inside of me and it's slowly coming to a brew. I know that I truly do want to be a part of process that will help children and youth get their feet back on the ground. Get them away from a situation where they are at risk and don't have a healthy home situation. I want to help them to find themselves, have a fair chance and strive in an environment that abides by the United Nations charter of rights for children, a life where they can begin to receive everything that they deserve out of life. A life where I help them do what they eventually I want to make sure that they get the help they need to face their past, grow from it and learn how to be successful in the future. I want them to become stronger because of their unjust life experience and help others going through the same things as they receive help also. I would really like to involve other youth in this road to recovery and success, youth that have been through similar things so that we are all learning and sharing with one another. I want youth to help lead other troubled youth during this rocky road so that they can come out strong together. Youth can help to be a positive example of what positive growth looks like coming from a previous negative home life situation. I'm not quite sure where this will lead me to but I can honestly say that every time I travel, see a new place, meet new people, or enter a new work environment I learn more not only about others, but about myself and what I want to get out of life and what to give.
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