Hope

Everything gets put in a different perspective when you put yourself in another persons shoes.

The last couple mornings at the Hogar have been a little bit more tough than usual. Of course with each day comes it´s own struggles, but the other day I was getting so discouraged with myself and frustrated with some of the children while dealing with complete chaos, disrespect and abuse from our kinder students and special needs boy that I decided to take a little breather and center myself outside during recess. As I walked towards the Hogar gate our newest girl of 13 years started to walk up to me. I was so happy to see her initiate that simple movement towards me. I put my arm around her and asked if she´d like to go sit in the play house with me.
As we sat together in the little ¨casita¨ I felt myself take on just a little bit of what she might be experiencing and totally release every ounce of discouragement and stress that I had been dealing with. I asked her how her first day and night had been and I was happy to hear her positive response that she was happy to be here and had made new friends already. However she told me that she didn´t sleep the previous night and when I asked why she said she wasn´t tired and so I responded with saying that I understood that when things are very new and different it can be hard but everything would be okay and that I was always here for her to listen and to talk with. It was really important for me to say that from the get go to her. I really wanted to open myself up to her as not only a friend but someone she can truly confide in.
This is a precious little girl who has been through more than most of us could ever imagine or possibly know how to deal with. Her situation was so devastating that our founder had her removed from her mountain home and immediately brought to the Hogar instead of going through a foster home placement before hand like all of the other Hogar children. I felt physically sick as I was informed of the utterly disturbing details of her previous home life situation. This jem of girl has suffered both physical and sexual abuse at home from both her father AND her brother as well as malnutrition. From her neck all the way down her arms she is covered in layers of severe 2nd and 3rd degree burns. Just to look at her is a constant reminder of everything she must have been through...all the pain and suffering. My heart can´t help but break each and every single time that I am with her. Although this transition must be immensly hard for her I am so, so, so happy that she is here, safe at the Hogar where we can offer her a better life filled with love and protection. And in fact, the sad reality is that soon enough after going through puberty if she had stayed at home she would have eventually ended up pregnant by her father or brother and never would have been offered the education and lifestyle that we can give her here at the Hogar, a life of hope.
I could never possibly look on my days here at the hogar as truly bad days ever again. Of course we have our ups and downs, and yes we call them the good days and the ¨bad¨ days but a good day and bad day is really put into perspective once you are eye to eye or hand in hand with an innocent child who has experienced more than enough of what a bad day truly is. After befriending and really empathazing with this little girl and what she has to deal with and will continue to deal with for her whole life I can really see now just how privledged I am to have been born into this life that I am so blessed to be living.